Sunday, September 28, 2014

Tiny Terrible Tale #10: The Snoracle



The snoring man slept on a clear night, with many stars staring down at the campers gathered around the Shaman circle fire. At first, the five friends carried on carousing, not even aware of the snoring man. But as conversations waned, they couldn’t help but hear the snores.


“I wonder what it means,” said Ben.


“What what means?” Asked Bek.


“The snores. I’m curious… there’s got to be at least one religion where sleep is interpreted by someone other than the sleeper. Like, could there be a religion based on, say, snores?”


Just then, a loud rumbling snore emitted from the tent across the way.


“The snoring man says yes!” Ben exclaimed. They all laughed.


A guy from another circle wandered over to their fire. “Do any of you know where Shana’s camped?”


None of them knew Shana, but as they were about to tell him that when the snoring man made a noise that sounded like the word left.


“The snoracle has spoken! She is either camped on the left or she left.”


The guy’s cell phone beeped. He looked down and read a text. “Huh. Looks like she did leave. Some sort of emergency at home?” He waved and hurried off.


They all turned to Ben. He grinned and shrugged. “Coincidence?” Then with a mischievous look, he said, “or is it?”


They laughed.


Paul sat forward with rosy cheeks, his Scouser accent thick with alcohol. “Gonna rain?” He asked.


A light airy snore answered, “yeeeeeessssss.”


They all turned their faces to the sky that had been clear just seconds before and it poured only on them for five seconds then stopped,


“That was weird,” Jeanine murmured, sober and and somber from the dousing.


“I have a question,” Kelly hopped up excitedly, shaking water from her hair and body. “What is the answer?”


A long, drawn out snore that sounded like, “Forty-two.”


They laughed again.


At the same time, both Bek and Ben spoke.


Ben asked, “What is the question?”


At the same time Bek said, “When will we die?”


The snorer said, “that in minutes.”

Forty-two minutes later they were all dead.